Squids, Lasers, and Cupcakes on the Moon

Having been subjected to many annoying conversations that begin with, “last night I dreamed…”, I try not to share my dreams that often. But this one was a doozy and led to interesting results, so I’m going to share today. So the dream I had last night was very vivid and realistic. In it a large, glowing Squid-Being was slowly and insidiously siphoning away the vitality of our planet because that was evidently just what it did. In order to stop it (conventional weapons were useless) I had to devise a complex metaphysical method to carefully suck away its life force. I got that far but didn’t know how to return the energy to the planet, so I became supercharged with energy which was not only a great rush, but also gave me the power to fly and shoot purple lasers from my hands. And I don’t mean, like magical abilities either — I just understood how to do these equations that would translate the energy into different states — it was very Zen and Enlightened Math.

The Squid-Being was not pleased with this development, so there was an epic interplanetary chase scene where I eventually drained away enough energy that the squid turned into a well-put-together, perky, blonde, twenty-something human woman who was then open for negotiations on the whole Planet Devouring Question. It helped that I had all the Force Lightning now. It turned out that really, she just wanted to be an entrepreneur and succeed at a small business venture involving her secret passion for baking. I offered to use my new god-like powers to help her start up a bakery on the moon. We discussed names, product and inventory and decided against a Bakery and Deli because fresh meat and cheese was hard to get on the moon, but definitely added coffee to the menu because, “The people on the moon need their coffee just like the rest of us.” Plus she could then hire some snobby baristas…

I woke up wanting to have a cupcake and mug of coffee while watching the Earth rise over the horizon. So while I had my not-moon-brewed decaf coffee with peanut butter toast this morning, I went over to check out what the folks at Mach 30 are up to — any moon colonies or laser guns yet? Sadly, not yet, but I did catch up on their other recent progress. Those of you who follow me on Facebook (and if you don’t, you should — I’m occasionally hilarious and never spammy) have noticed that I will sometimes share cool space-related news in an effort to make our civilization more like the worlds of Star Wars, Star Trek, and Firefly (without the Reavers, please) and Mach 30 is where I get some of those items as their mission and goals are pretty much that too, except they have actual plans, projects and rocket scientists instead of squid dreams and crazy space collages. Anyway, see the cool new graphic badge in the upper right of the sidebar on my home page? That’s right, I’m helping! No rocket science required — which I could totally do if I remembered the Enlightened Math Formulas from my dream, alas. But I volunteered to do some creative writing or design and illustration for them if they need it.

If you are intrigued by this, bored, or jealous of my pretty web badge, click on it to find out what the Catalyst Club is and see if you can help too. Because even though an organization looks like they are awesome, tentacly, and unstoppable, inside they are sometimes just a hopeful girl with bakery dreams who needs some purple lasers to the face in order to use her powers for good. Be the laser with me.

OK, so that last paragraph really sounds like one of The Tick’s closing monologues, but the point is that dreams are cool, the human imagination is powerful, and if we all come together as a community to realize our dreams, we can have cupcakes and coffee on the moon.

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One Response to “Squids, Lasers, and Cupcakes on the Moon”

  1. Haha! LOVE this! Excellent! ….I mean….”SPOOON!!”

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