Competant Designers Finish Last

Dear Ass-Face Person in Pakistan Who Underbid Me on that Laying Out a Book Job:

I understand that your cost of living is lower. That’s cool. I understand that you *know* how to use Photoshop and stock images. Also cool. You are entitled to make a living with your skills just like me.

But DO NOT frakking bid to lay out a 100 page book (for Printing, not Web publishing), and then DO IT IN PHOTOSHOP at 150 dpi! Because you know what happens? The client comes back to me (who did custom illustrations and gave them an actual print-ready file) and asks if I can format your mess into something their printer won’t laugh at.

So much RAGE.

Oh, I also noticed that your “slick formatting” removed a bunch of the spaces between words, some actual words, and a paragraph or two so that you know, the book is unreadable in places. I’m enjoying going through it and adding those spaces/words/paragraphs back in. NOT. (ok, actually I am enjoying it a little because I really do like editing and correcting writing and grammar. It’s a Lawful thing.)

Now, I’m happy for me that the client is a super person who wants to pay me more for cleaning up your mess, but I am angry with you for wasting his money and time with your no doubt well-meant but ignorant shenanigans when I could have done the whole job right to begin with in the first place. You probably also wasted a substantial amount of your own time, too — each page number is its own text layer for shit’s sake!

And don’t get me started on why you shouldn’t do two-page spreads as your final files… unless you’ve already paginated them the way they need to be to print. Which you didn’t. Because that would be insanity with a document this size. Have you ever done anything for physical printing? Maybe you’ve done some newspapers, since that’s about all the resolution in your files is good for. I’m waiting to see if the client does actually get the hi-res image files from you for me to use… or if you just pilfered stuff off the internet illegally and I’ll get to redo all those as well… Update: yes.

Bottom line: if you’re going to try to steal my jobs, at least attempt to be better at them than I am. But no, really, thanks… I needed more work last week, so your crappy job is my clean-up windfall.

Also, I hate you and your ass-face.

Sincerely,

Evil Bekka

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2 Responses to “Competant Designers Finish Last”

  1. LMAO! Really. Just read this. Some of the funniest venting ever. What a great good night laugh!

  2. Rozewolf Says:

    I so understand this point of view. I’m a seamstress. I create, make, design clothing, costumes and historically accurate garb. And I get so frustrated with people who do not understand that I do not work for pennies on the dollar.

    Or, who want me to repair, fix, resize their cheap stuff. Grrr…

    I’m also a freelance writer… won’t even start that rant. However, some day… I have this children’s story I want illustrated…

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